Beauty and The Buzz
Are You The Transition Girl? by The Average Guy
When you start to date a guy that has recently left a long term relationship, you may be the transition girl. Who is this person you ask? Well, she's the girl that a guy dates when he leaves a relationship and gets back the dating field again. She is not the girl that he marries. She is nice but will not be the one, through not fault of her own.
A guy leaving a long term relationship will want to get back into the dating pool pretty quickly. He has something to prove. Also, he's a guy. He likes sex and girls, transitional or not, are the only ones dispensing that magical elixir. Guys seek a really nice girl and of course, the nice girl wants to settle down right away. But, our friend has just gotten out of a long term relationship. He wants to play the field a little bit and see what's been happening while he was trapped in the 'going nowhere' relationship. It is rare that people go straight from one long term relationship to another.
So, if you see this guy, let him continue to play the field. This is not a bad guy, but he needs to look around a little bit before he can say that he wants to be with you exclusively. Frankly, you want him to date around and to make an informed decision to come back to you. The informed decision is made after he has a chance to see what's out there and then he makes a decision to come back to you.
Usually guys like this will tell you that they just left a relationship and are just dating around. Women make the mistake of thinking that they will change this guy and he will stop his journey to find the right woman. He won't. When he makes the decision to start looking for the right one, then he's ready to start interviewing candidates for the job. Until then he's just looking.
Here's the perfect analogy that I think women will understand. When women shop, they can go from store to store just looking. If they see something they want, they might buy it and maybe not. But, until they see something they really want, they are just browsing from store to store. In dating and relationships, you want to date the guy that is looking to buy. You don't want the guy that's just window shopping.
I believe that this simple misunderstanding is a cause of many of the disagreements between the sexes. People don't want to listen to what they are being told. I believe that men do tell women that they are just looking and women decide that they can turn the looker into a buyer. Don't try to do this! Believe what he's telling you. Tell the looker that you'd be interested in seeing him when he's interested in looking for a relationship and not just looking around.
When you start to date a guy that has recently left a long term relationship, you may be the transition girl. Who is this person you ask? Well, she's the girl that a guy dates when he leaves a relationship and gets back the dating field again. She is not the girl that he marries. She is nice but will not be the one, through not fault of her own.
A guy leaving a long term relationship will want to get back into the dating pool pretty quickly. He has something to prove. Also, he's a guy. He likes sex and girls, transitional or not, are the only ones dispensing that magical elixir. Guys seek a really nice girl and of course, the nice girl wants to settle down right away. But, our friend has just gotten out of a long term relationship. He wants to play the field a little bit and see what's been happening while he was trapped in the 'going nowhere' relationship. It is rare that people go straight from one long term relationship to another.
So, if you see this guy, let him continue to play the field. This is not a bad guy, but he needs to look around a little bit before he can say that he wants to be with you exclusively. Frankly, you want him to date around and to make an informed decision to come back to you. The informed decision is made after he has a chance to see what's out there and then he makes a decision to come back to you.
Usually guys like this will tell you that they just left a relationship and are just dating around. Women make the mistake of thinking that they will change this guy and he will stop his journey to find the right woman. He won't. When he makes the decision to start looking for the right one, then he's ready to start interviewing candidates for the job. Until then he's just looking.
Here's the perfect analogy that I think women will understand. When women shop, they can go from store to store just looking. If they see something they want, they might buy it and maybe not. But, until they see something they really want, they are just browsing from store to store. In dating and relationships, you want to date the guy that is looking to buy. You don't want the guy that's just window shopping.
I believe that this simple misunderstanding is a cause of many of the disagreements between the sexes. People don't want to listen to what they are being told. I believe that men do tell women that they are just looking and women decide that they can turn the looker into a buyer. Don't try to do this! Believe what he's telling you. Tell the looker that you'd be interested in seeing him when he's interested in looking for a relationship and not just looking around.
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